Ed. note: This is the latest installment in a series of posts on motherhood in the legal profession, in partnership with our friends at MothersEsquire. Welcome Jeanine M. Donohue back to our pages. Click here if you’d like to donate to MothersEsquire.
The traditional rainmaking model assumes someone else is handling dinner, homework and bedtime:
Golf at 1 p.m. on Fridays.
Cocktail receptions that begin at 6:30 and stretch well past the point of diminishing returns.
Weekend conferences in attractive cities that are functionally inaccessible unless you have extensive backup at home.
I did not have this kind of back up as a Single Mom By Choice to twins. For working mothers like me, that model is not merely inconvenient. It is structurally misaligned with reality.
The quiet truth, though, is this: it is also outdated.
Business development has never truly been about proximity to a bar cart. It is about trust, relevance, and consistency-all factors of relationship building which take time and patience. Working mothers who understand that distinction are often better positioned to build sustainable books of business than their peers who equate visibility with value.
Redefine What Counts As Business Development
Many firms still reward performative networking — the optics of constant attendance, the mythology of the rainmaker who is everywhere at once. But clients do not hire lawyers because they attended the most receptions. They hire lawyers who solve problems and who are responsive both to their needs and to their complaints.
Business development is not:
- Attending everything.
- Being the last person standing at an industry event.
- Saying yes to every invitation in the name of “exposure.”
It is:
- Strategic relationship cultivation.
- Industry fluency.
- Follow-up discipline.
- Becoming synonymous with a particular type of solution and most importantly,
- Being good at what you do.
Working mothers tend to develop sharper time discipline out of necessity. Getting a motion filed, driving car pool, and attend that PTA meeting all require planning and execution. That discipline is not a limitation; it is a competitive advantage. When you cannot afford to waste three hours, you prepare more intentionally for the one hour you do have.
The Power Of The Midday Meeting
Lunch is the most underutilized rainmaking tool in the profession.
General counsel and executives are busy. They often prefer efficient, focused conversations during the workday over evening events that compete with their own family obligations. A well-prepared lunch — with a clear agenda and thoughtful follow-up — routinely accomplishes more than three cocktail receptions. A fabulous business development coach I hired suggested Zoom lunches where I offer to have a lunch delivered to the person’s office or send delivery gift cards to them ahead of the lunch for them to order their favorite lunch. This out-of-the-box idea has been a hot one for networking and business development as it shows respect and consideration for the person’s very valuable time.
Preparation should resemble litigation strategy: understand the client’s industry pressures, recent developments, insurance coverage landscape, regulatory shifts, or transaction trends. Arrive ready to discuss something useful, not merely to “catch up.” Ask questions about what are the biggest issues and problem the person is facing. Offer to help if you are able or offer to connect them to someone who can or even someone else in their industry who may be experiencing the same issues.
Then follow up with substance — an article, a case update, a practical checklist relevant to their business. One targeted, value-driven interaction builds more credibility than repeated superficial contact.
Working mothers, already accustomed to optimizing limited time, often excel in this format. Efficiency reads as respect.
Thought Leadership As Scalable Visibility
If traditional networking is built on physical presence, modern business development is built on intellectual presence.
An article can reach hundreds of potential clients without requiring an evening away from home. A panel scheduled during business hours can position you as a subject-matter authority. A short, practical post explaining a legal development can reinforce your expertise to both current and prospective clients.
Thought leadership is scalable rainmaking. It allows you to build recognition without relying on constant in-person attendance. More importantly, it attracts the right clients — those seeking competence and clarity rather than social familiarity.
Working mothers often underestimate the cumulative power of consistent writing and speaking. One article does little. Ten over two years build a brand. And believe me, I get that one has a million things on their to-do list, but this is an investment in you and your future.
Visibility does not require exhaustion.
Internal Business Development: The Overlooked Lever
External networking receives most of the attention, but internal positioning within a firm is equally critical.
If you are the lawyer everyone calls to “help” when a matter becomes difficult, ensure that you are also visible when new matters arise. Competence can quietly become a tax — particularly for women who are perceived as reliable fixers.
Internal business development means:
- Communicating clearly about the work you want.
- Protecting your rate integrity.
- Being explicit about your expertise.
- Ensuring credit structures align with contribution.
Working mothers, already balancing multiple demands, cannot afford to invest significant time in matters that erode their long-term positioning. Strategic selectivity is not selfish; it is sustainable. As one good friend lawyer-mom advised me, the future you are creating is so that ultimately you can control how you spend your time — both at work and at home.
Boundaries As A Strategic Signal
There is a persistent myth that availability equals commitment. In reality, scarcity often enhances perceived value.
When you attend selectively, speak deliberately, and focus your energy, you signal that your time is meaningful. Clients do not need their lawyer at every event. They need their lawyer when it matters.
Boundaries also filter clients. Executives with families frequently appreciate working with counsel who understand time constraints. Efficiency and respect for schedule resonate across industries.
Exhaustion does not build confidence. Competence does.
Playing The Long Game
Working mothers often build business differently. Less flash, more durability. Fewer shallow contacts, more substantive relationships.
Because time is finite, relationships tend to be intentional. Because commitments are real, reliability becomes non-negotiable. Over time, that steadiness compounds.
Books of business built on trust, expertise, and consistent value survive economic downturns more effectively than those built on social proximity alone.
The traditional rainmaking model was designed around a professional who had structural freedom at home. That model is neither neutral nor inevitable. It is simply one approach.
Working mothers do not need to replicate it to succeed.
A smarter model exists:
- Midday strategy over late-night visibility.
- Substance over volume.
- Thought leadership over performative attendance.
- Boundaries over burnout.
- Long-term positioning over short-term optics.
Sustainable rainmaking is not about being everywhere. It is about being indispensable to the right clients.
And that is a model working mothers are uniquely equipped to master.
Jeanine M. Donohue is a member of Buchalter’s Litigation Practice Group and Wineries, Vineyards and Breweries Practice Group. She practices in the firm’s St. Helena and San Francisco offices. With over 30 years of experience, Jeanine is a big picture strategist who quickly appreciates the 30,000 foot major issues, while also being attentive to the nuances and important details of each matter she handles. Jeanine maintains a broad litigation practice that includes insurance recovery, commercial, real estate and products liability. Since 2013, Jeanine has served as Outside General Counsel to four active 524(g) settlement trusts with over $1 billion in assets. She manages all outside trust litigation including insurance coverage litigation, bankruptcy and adversary proceedings.
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