Contrary to the myth that the in-house life is a cushy 9 to 5, where we call the shots from a desk with our feet propped up, the reality is that we, as company lawyers, have stress too. More often than not, we are jumping from meeting to meeting, triaging client questions, juggling compliance projects, and managing multiple stakeholders and their business priorities, trying to get it all done. Candidly, I am personally in a season of burnout. In case you are too, here are some things that I’m working on, in case it’s helpful to you.
1. Get Back To The Basics
When I find myself near burnout, these things are usually true and worse, cumulative:
- I am sleeping four to six hours, instead of the seven-plus I personally need and am working every night after the kids go to bed.
- I am not eating well, skipping meals during the day, and gorging unhealthily at night.
- I have skipped workouts, meditating, and journaling.
As a result, I am exhausted, moody, lack patience, and snap at my kids and hubby — unable to show up as the mom and wife I want to be. I am certainly not proud to admit these things.
At the same time, it is important for me to be self-aware enough to spot these symptoms and realize that they stem from not taking care of myself. In these less-than-proud moments, it is when I remember that self-care is not a luxury — but a means of self-preservation and the way I can ensure that I show up as my best self for my family. I need to be physically and mentally healthy so that I can focus, manage stress, and be able to integrate work into the rest of my life instead of making work my life.
The takeaway here is remembering that taking care of yourself is not negotiable.
2. Redefining Your Non-Negotiables And Prioritizing The Rest
Speaking of non-negotiables, take the time to redefine what they are for you. For me, it is sleep. I am a person who needs at least six to eight hours of sleep. I also need some kind of movement. And for my mental health, I need to journal, even if it is for five minutes to get stuff out of my head or to create a list of things I got done that day so I can quiet my anxiety and feel good about the day. If I can ensure that these three things happen, I’m feeling well.
I have also made taking the kids to bed a non-negotiable. I know that there is a finite amount of time when they are at the age where they want me to tuck them in, and I refuse to squander it, if I don’t have to. This may look differently for you. I know that for a friend of mine, an episode of something on Netflix with her spouse is non-negotiable.
Beyond the non-negotiables, consider your work to-do list. What do you actually need to get done on any single day? What has actual deadlines and what can be pushed? The reality is that while there are often competing priorities, you can only do one thing at a time well, so take the time to prioritize your to-do list down to one or two things you have to tackle and get done in a single day. Any more priorities than that will likely be unrealistic and only serve to make you feel terrible because you didn’t get it all done.
In this reflection work, know that every time you say yes to something, you are saying no to everything else. Conversely, every time you say no to something, you are giving yourself the space to say yes to something you really want to do, or say yes to time to think, or do nothing, which can be equally important.
3. Constrain Your List And Delegate
As you review your to-do list, notice how things get on there. Do you have good filters or criteria for your to-do list? Are you unnecessarily volunteering to take things on that someone else should or could be doing? What do you actually need to personally do or want to do, and what can you get help on? As you ask yourself these questions, consider that you and your need to be helpful or your perfectionism could be a part of why your to-do list is overwhelming. Consider delegation — not because you want to pile on someone else but rather — is it a growth opportunity or leadership opportunity for someone else?
None of these tips are a panacea — but even taking the time to reflect on one of these practices may prevent or get you out of burnout.
Meyling “Mey” Ly Ortiz is in-house at Toyota Motor North America. Her passions include mentoring, championing belonging, and a personal blog: TheMeybe.com. At home, you can find her doing her best to be a “fun” mom to a toddler and preschooler and chasing her best self on her Peloton. You can follow her on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/meybe/). And you knew this was coming: her opinions are hers alone.
